Removing Mom Guilt

Mom-guilt. It’s such a loaded term filled with emotion. A phrase that creeps up and can gut punch you out of nowhere.


It starts from something innocent, but can quickly grow and fester. When a baby comes into this world, we hear EVERYTHING from EVERYONE 👉 “feed on a schedule”, “don’t feed on a schedule”; “wear your baby everywhere”, “don’t wear your baby”… 


These well intended comments about sleep schedules, parenting, maintaining a clean house, or working outside the home can wreak havoc on your soul when you start to compare yourself to other moms and feel guilty about your style of mommy-ing. 


But guess what? God uniquely designed each one of us to play into our strengths. He gave each of us special abilities to parent our children that he created for us. He does not want us to become consumed with fear, guilt, and anxiety because he loves us and wants us to draw near to him.


“Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us of a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water” (Hebrews 10:22).


I found myself in a season after my second daughter was born where I was full of mom-guilt and not drawing near to God. I thought if I wasn’t a working mom my mom-guilt would go away. I tried being a stay-at-home home mom and still had mom-guilt. I tried being a stay-at-home mom and working part time and I STILL HAD MOM-GUILT. Why? Because I was not drawing into God and letting him control my thoughts and abilities as a mom. Once I let go and let God control my path, the weight of mom-guilt significantly lifted.



My take away for you, then, is if you’re drowning in laundry, haven’t showered in four days, or you’re covered in spit-up right now … you are doing great!


Draw near to God and he will wash off any mom-guilt you are feeling.


Reflection Questions for Removing Mom Guilt:

  • Draw close to God and read Hebrews 10.
  • Address your thoughts when you compare yourself to others by writing 5 fears of motherhood.
  • Write 5 positive thoughts to overcome these fears and then write out your mom strengths (i.e. I am good at craft time with my kids).
  • Who is a mom you admire? Reach out to her and let her know how much she means to you.


Danielle Van Peursem lives near Lake Minnetonka with her husband, two little girls, and 90 pound labrador retriever. Danielle works as a Marketing Manager for Hope Chest for Breast Cancer Foundation, and loves helping her community. With balancing the working mom life, she enjoys all the snuggles from her girls, boating with her family, and croissants and endless chai tea! You can connect with her on Instagram @daniraelene.

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